If I'm being honest, I was dreaming about maternity leave the moment we decided to start trying to get me knocked up.
I mean of course the focus was on creating life, but I couldn't help but look at my office walls and think "One day, I won't see this place for months".
And since I've been pregnant - Oh forget about it. Going on leave has never been far from the forefront of my mind. (Side note: the word forefront always makes me think foreskin, but I digress).
Remember those paper chains, that you made in elementary school to count down the days until Christmas or Spring Break or Summer?
I have given serious thought to making one to hang in my office and countdown to maternity leave. Okay, so I have established how I feel about leave.
Now, the big news: I am going out on maternity leave effective Monday.
Holy crap.
I still have about about 6 weeks until my c/s. But with my BP being up and down and the fact that I am measuring a few weeks ahead - Spike and I are pulling the plug on work.
I can't really explain how I feel about it. I'm excited, obviously. But really nervous too. Nervous about change. Nervous about the financial piece of me not working. Nervous about that fact that being on maternity leave means having a baby relatively soon. Just nervous.
I suspect that this time off will be a really good thing. Good for me. Good for Jude. Good for my marriage. (Less stress = less bitching). Just good. And I'll probably look back in a week or so and be so happy that I took this extra time off.
But for now - I'm scared. Happy. But scared. Elated, actually. But still scared.
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Not to mention that you could make a paper chain with only 5 links in just a couple of minutes. That could pass a little of the time you have left in your office and tearing each one of those off every day would be pretty great.
ReplyDeleteYes, I am officially voting for the paper chain. In fact, I might just make one in your honor. :)